Jordan, ‘10

The past week and a half has been a mixed bag of positive experiences trying to compensate for one gigantic monumental tragic event.  I’ve had tests, meetings with teachers, moments alone when it was hard to breathe–I’m going to score these as more negative than under ordinary circumstances.  I’ve also reached out to strangers for comfort, interacted at a deeper level with my friends, and found a still peace that would be terrifying if I wasn’t too numb to feel it.  Or rather, the peace is numbing me out.  In fact, that’s probably more accurate.  Think of it as a fog that invested itself in my sanity.

 Though that sounds depressing (not to me but to some I know it will) rest assured that this post comes with at least a lining of innocent hope.  My mourning period is over–because I realized that it would be, for all intents and purposes, impossible to mourn my friend.  She was so full of rambunctious energy, so happy and crazy and enthusiastic.  She loved me in a million unforgettable ways and her presence is no less felt than it was before. 

 

So I’m going to leave you with that, at least for now, and I’ll write more later,

Catch the light,

Jordan

Quote of the week:

“They are not long, the weeping and the laughter,
Love and desire and hate:
I think they have no portion in us after
We pass the gate.
They are not long, the days of wine and roses;
Out of a misty dream
Our path emerges for a while, then closes
Within a dream.”
-Ernest Dowson