Last night I had a pleasant dream about skydiving. I was soaring hybrid superman-batman style, my arms spread away from the center of my body like flying squirrel flaps (not bird wings—I wasn’t flying after all), warm desert air sheltering me like a translucent cocoon in the sky. The landing was of the sort described only in Gothic or medieval fantasies. Or, in my case, like the descension carried out by one of my favorite film characters of all time–Selene. I touched down on one knee like that sexy UnderworldKate Beckinsale “I’m all depressed ‘cause my family was killed off by monsters twelve-hundred years ago and I can’t let it go yet” landing. I could feel everything. Couldn’t tell you where I was or the identity of my skydiving companion (He never took off his helmet. Or landed, either, I realize now), but I can tell you it was the best decision I had ever made. Sad that it came in a dream.
The meaning of this vision is obvious, my friends. The restlessness of my present circumstances is infecting my brain—killer virus bent on subduing all coherent thought or rational patience. But who ever decided that patience is rational? If I’m honest I’ve always been torn by the concept of patience. Occasionally I wish that I could train myself to be more easy-going, but my ambition and curiosity knows absolutely NO bounds. None whatsoever. And that’s one thought that doesn’t trouble me in the slightest. I would feel crooked or unwound without that buzzing vibration in the back of the warehouse in my mind. It’s a warning system not so subtly telling me that elements of this reality have stagnated. And, all confessed, I would rather have agitation than stagnation. Sorry, was that whole paragraph disparagingly random?
I have twenty-six days in the frosted wilderness of my parents’ town where time’s speed is as disjointed as the rampant ramblings of my consciousness before I make my own descension into the rambling continent where time is frosted slow by my high spirits and the weather is more conducive to my olive skin and warmth-drawn personality.
Stagnated fantasies
Jordan
If you could imagine what phyiscal form my mind would take…this is pretty close. A tree in Florida that I fell in love with.
Quote of the week:
“So this I swear to you
and this I swear to me
I’ll never rest till I’ve seen all I can see. (2x)
I want to know where the strength of a person lies,in their past or their future.
Is in the way that they hurt or they love themselves? Or is it all an illusion?
I want to crawl from this skin that I’m painted in, body please let it give.
I want to find the creator of all good things and ask what it means to live.”
- “All I Can See” performed by Brendan James
