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So, It’s the 12th of December, and I have twinges of joy traveling up my spine.Some of this is attributable to the fact that I’m halfway done with finals, and less than a week away from my birthday, Christmas, and a whole lot o’ down time with my family. But most of my joy stems from the 70+ degree weather we’ve been having lately.It all started a couple weeks ago. Hearing of Richmond’s sizeable endowment, Santa Clause visited the university to see if he could pawn off surplus laboratory equipment his elves had built. Unfortunatly, he was a bit late in coming due to negotiations with Iranian nuclear scientists lasting longer than he expected (the scientists were disappointed to learn that they’d be recieving coal instead of the yellowcake they asked for). By the time St. Nick actually got around to coming, it was too late to haggle, and he decided to carouse a bit with Richmond’s students, coolpeople that we are. 
When my turn came to sit on santa’s bench (he gave up the lap thing after an incident with Marilyn Manson), I decided to see if we couldn’t come to a deal that would serve both our interests. “Santa,” said I, “You know I’ve been a good kid for quite a while now, and instead of big gifts, I’d like you to do me a favor this year.” “Ho Ho Ho, Santa would be happy to do what he could for a good little boy” said Santa, in a tone reminiscent of Bob Dole. So I told him. The way I saw it, he and Mrs Clause could retire someplace warm if he’d just melt the polar icecaps. When he inquired with a chuckle “Ho Ho, Now why would santa want to do a thing like that?”, I informed him that a good many powerful people and nations owned arable land at high altitudes, and that if he and his elves were willing to accelerate global warming, those people and nations would stand to gain a great deal of power. While Santa Clause agreed that he was getting awfully tired of cold weather in his old age, I left that bench without a clear answer.In the last couple of days, the weather in Richmond has been warm enough for shorts, with no end in sight. The sun is-a-shining, and the water levels are rising- I am optimistic that the future holds good tidings for the new year.Â
It’s been two days since I woke up, looked in the mirror, and found my hair thoroughly frazzled.
It’s been two days, and despite doing everything in my power short of cutting my hair, I still look like a character from a japanese anime.
a side by side comparison:
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 After analyzing the situation in more detail, I’ve arrived at two possible reasons as to why my hair is standing on end.
1. Caffein use. With so much to do at Richmond, it’s often well advised to make the most of it with America’s favorite stimulant. Everyone has thier favorite method of delivery, from the traditional cup of coffee to topical shower soaps. My personal favorite is the caffeinated chewing gum sold at the campus convenience store. Sold in packs of twelve pieces, the label claims each piece of gum is equivalent to half a cup of coffee. If this is true, one pack of gum is equivalent to six cups of coffee, making it one of the most cost effective sources of caffein available on the market.2. Academic Rigour.Yes, it’s that time of year…essays, lab reports, and the last tests prior to finals all converge in one frightful nexus. With only three weeks left before the semester ends, everyone’s nose is to the grindstone. Coming back from vacation and realizing this is kind of like looking at a ksunami wave right before it wipes an island off the map. There’s nothing you can do but hold your breath and swim against the current.There are a lot of different strategies people use to cope with the stress of finals and such, but for what it’s worth, here’s my take:
The best way to survive late semester is to live life like a guerilla war. As history and leadership majors should know, the thing that differentiates guerilla warfare from conventional warfighting techniques is that as long as the insurgency hasn’t quit fighting, it hasn’t lost. I’m waging a guerilla war on life, and so long as I keep fighting, I have not lost. Anyway, If my hair gets any more bouyant, it’ll be time to start emitting energy blasts from my fingers. Until next time, I’ll be chained to my desk working on a Biology lab report.
